Want to have a closer connection with your kid? It can feel impossible, but therapist Melinda O’Neil says focusing on a few things, like fostering independence and encouraging emotional intelligence, can build that bond. These are her tips for parents to help get closer with their kids.
- Become a fan - If your eyes glaze over when your kid rattles on about video games, dinosaurs or pop stars, you’re not alone, but O’Neil says embracing their interests is crucial for bonding. That means giving whatever they’re into a chance, and showing some interest in it. If they’re willing to share their music, give it a listen, or chaperone them at a concert, just don’t forget the earplugs!
- Rephrase your questions - Tired of the one-word responses when you ask “How was school today?” Get specific by asking things like “Did you see your friend today?” or “What was the funniest thing that happened today?” This encourages kids to open up and have a real conversation with you.
- Own your own mistakes - Parents aren’t perfect, so if you lose your temper, tell your kid, “I got really frustrated and shouldn’t have reacted that way.” It shows them that mistakes are a normal part of life and teaches them how to navigate emotions and interactions in a healthy, positive way.
- Try new things - It’s good for everyone to get out of their comfort zone sometimes, even kids. Trying new things as a family, whether it’s a hobby, different restaurant, or activity, like a cooking class, helps expand kids’ worlds. They’re not always going to be into it, and that’s okay, just keep encouraging curiosity and congratulate them for trying.
- Let them be emotional - “Feelings can be uncomfortable, but if your child is experiencing one, let them,” O’Neil advises. “Be present. Sit with them in their sadness, frustration, or joy.” Give them space to feel the feelings, even if it’s tough for you, because it helps with emotional intelligence.
- Parent yourself - According to this expert, the best parenting starts with self-growth. “The best thing you can do for your child is to become a healthier version of yourself,” she explains. That means acknowledging your mistakes, working on your emotional responses and showing yourself the same compassion you’d show them.
Source: Good News Network
Scott's Thoughts:
- Do you really want to listen to emo music or hear more facts about trains? No, but if it brings you closer to your kid? It’s all worth it!
- I tried to always listen to my children. Still do when given the opportunity even though they are really young adults now.
- Let them be kids. Let them be young. Let them explore, make mistakes and enjoy their young life.